🏡 Never Miss a Home Task Again — Your House Texts You Before Stuff Breaks.
Prevent costly mistakes. Save money. Stress less. Free for 100 days.
⏰ Time’s Ticking, Smart Human 😏
Be one of the first 100 to join before Homey shuts the doors on Nov 30 at 11:59 PM.
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How It Works
Text Me Homey keeps your home on schedule — automatically
Sign Up
Answer a few quick questions about your home (HVAC, pool, lawn, etc.)
Get Texts
Homey sends smart, friendly reminders for maintenance and safety tasks.
Text Back “Done”
Homey logs it, resets the timer, and adjusts your reminders.
Relax
Homey’s on reminder duty now. No more sticky notes, no more “I’ll do it tomorrow.” He’s got you.
Because Home Maintenance Sucks (Until Now)
Most homeowners forget basic stuff — until it costs thousands. Homey keeps you ahead of the curve with simple reminders for:
Air filters & HVAC tune-ups
Pool & lawn care
Smoke alarms & fire extinguishers
Pest control
All things water: filters, softener, heater, leak checks
Garage door upkeep
Housekeeping
Simple appliance maintenance
Energy-saving and weather alerts
Plus many other customizable home tasks and maintenance reminders
Why Homey Wins Every Time
You could download another app… or just text your house. See how Text Me Homey stacks up against complicated apps and old-school DIY methods
| Feature | Text Me Homey | Maintenance Apps | DIY (Notes/Calendar) |
|---|---|---|---|
| No app required (SMS only) | ✅ | ❌ | ✅ |
| Fun personalities (you choose the vibe) | ✅ | ❌ | ❌ |
| Smart, timed reminders (seasonal + recurring) | ✅ | ⚠️ | ❌ |
| Reply “DONE” to auto-log tasks | ✅ | ❌ | ❌ |
| Maintenance history & reports | ✅ | ⚠️ | ❌ |
| Connects you to trusted local pros | ✅ | ⚠️ | ❌ |
| Home Health Score™ | ✅ | ❌ | ❌ |
| Family member tracking | ✅ | ⚠️ | ❌ |
| Weather & recall alerts | ✅ | ⚠️ | ❌ |
| Setup time | 2 min | 15–30 min | Ongoing |
| Cost of forgetting stuff | Low | Medium | High |
✅ Best-in-class ⚠️ Sometimes/limited ❌ Not supported
MEET HOMEY’S PERSONALITIES
Same house. Different vibes.
Feeling chill? Go Minimalist.
Need a pep talk? Coach Homey’s got you.
Want some judgment with love? Grandma’s waiting.
It’s like giving your house multiple personalities — but in a fun, legal way. 😂
CLASSIC HOMEY
— 😏Sarcastic best friend energy
COACH HOMEY
— 😎Motivational dad vibes
GRANDMA HOMEY
— 👵Sweet but judgmental
MINIMALIST HOMEY
— 😌Calm, efficient reminders
HIPHOP HOMEY
— 🕺🏽Speaks in bars and slang
ROCKSTAR HOMEY
— 🎸Intense and full of energy
Pick Your Level of Homey-ness 😏
Whether you just want a few friendly reminders or full-blown house management with sass, there’s a Homey plan for you.
No contracts, no hidden fees, no weird small print — just a house that texts you before things get expensive.
Start simple or go full Legend — either way, your home’s about to get a whole lot happier (and maybe a little judgy).
Why Homeowners Love Text Me Homey
Simple, smart, and actually kind of hilarious. Homey makes home maintenance effortless — and fun.
💬
Texts You Understand
Friendly reminders you’ll actually read — not cold app notifications.
🏠
No App. No Stress.
No downloads, no logins, just simple SMS that works instantly.
⏰
Never Forget Again
From air filters to smoke alarms — Homey remembers everything so you don’t have to.
🧰
Homey Marketplace
Connects you instantly with trusted local pros when something breaks.
💬
Text-a-Pro Support
Got a problem? Text and get real answers — no waiting on hold.
👨👩👧
Add Family Members
Assign tasks or reminders by text — no more “I didn’t know!” excuses
🔧
Prevents Costly Repairs
Stop $3,000 problems with $10 reminders — Homey catches issues early.
🧠
Learns Your Habits
Homey adjusts to your routines and local weather for smarter timing.
😎
Choose Your Personality
Sarcastic, sweet, or savage — pick your Homey vibe.
🌴
Manage Multiple Homes
Vacation house? Rental? Homey keeps them all on schedule.
💵
Save Time & Money
No forgotten chores, no surprise breakdowns — just easy upkeep.
❤️
Peace of Mind 24/7
Your home stays happy, healthy, and taken care of — even when you’re busy.
📈
Protect Home Value
Regular upkeep = higher resale. Homey helps without you even trying.
🧠
Smart but Simple
All the intelligence of a smart home — without the complexity.
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Sign Up Now
Be one of the first 100 subscribers to get 100 days free subscription
Frequently Asked Questions
Useful Enough to Save You Money. Funny Enough to Make You Laugh
Homey turns boring home maintenance into something you’ll actually remember — and maybe even enjoy.
He’ll text you before things break, remind you to do the little stuff that saves thousands, and throw in a few jokes along the way.
It’s like having a handyman, a life coach, and a comedian… all living in your walls. 😏
